Marriage is . . .

CONGRATULATIONS! 😀 Now that Valentine’s Day has come and gone, there are many new engaged couples walking around in premarital bliss. As the lady shows off her beautiful diamond, she’ll probably receive many superficial compliments about her husband to be based on the size of the stone and shiny platinum setting. She will be swept up in conversations about the details of the wedding while he will probably go on with his life as usual. In the midst of all the planning, my prayer is that they have people in their lives that will impart godly wisdom regarding the actual marriage.

People mean well when they give advice, but sometimes it does more damage than good. For instance, one piece of advice that’s been handed down to quite a few women is to hide money from their husbands which is referred to as mad money. Hide money just in case. Just in case what? If you feel you have to hide something from the person you’re planning to spend the rest of your life with, perhaps you should consider postponing the wedding until you figure out the issue. Men are often told that innocent flirting is harmless and completely unnecessary to tell the wife. Would the husband  feel the same if his wife was the flirtee? And what deep issues does the husband have that makes him desire the attention from another woman?

I remember when Antoine and I were preparing for our big day and long life together, people would tell us that marriage is hard, a lot of work, fun, good, bad, etc. We were warned that eventually the lovey-dovey phase of the first or second year of marriage would fade leaving us with the reality of marriage. Which is what? Antoine and I decided a long time ago that our marriage would be different and nothing like any that we had ever seen.

While I am the first person to recommend premarital counseling to any engaged couple, I encourage them to make their own reality. It’s nice to ask for advice, but you cannot and should not plan your marriage according to someone else’s experience. How can you? Your significant other is unique and so are you. Even if you have a lot in common with another couple, it’s still not enough. Your reality is your reality. Tolerance levels are different. What another woman or man may tolerate may be intolerable to you.

Marriage is . . . it depends on who you ask. Marriage to me is the best experience of my life and I look forward to the years to come in the Lord. I see my husband as a blessing from God. No he isn’t perfect, neither am I. One of my main goals in life is to be the best wife I can be because that pleases not only my husband; it pleases God.

Marriage is what you and your spouse make it. Remember, these are my thoughts. I’m just blogging them out. 😀











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